Sirling Albion 1 v 1 Hibs – Hibs 5-4 on Pens

Ok, I feel like writing this Just Back in capital letters as that was fucking rotten. Where to start? Well I could start by saying that Albion could have been mistaken for the Premiership team, Hibs the second division’diddies’. I could start with the fact that far too many Hibs players looked like they were out for a kick about, not to stake their claim in the new era team. I could start by saying that the mythical pressing game linked to Hecky, is just that, mythical? I could suggest that at least one of the new signings is NOT good enough, the majority of the others are squad plaayers. Maybe I could start by saying that these games are being treated as pre season games with lots of changes and trying new things out, only we didnae make changes and the only thing we tried was everything to get the so far useless dud Newell into the game. Then I could strat by saying that dinnae worry, when the ‘real’ season starts, we will be fine, I cannae, as I dinnae want to lie to you all. I accept we started without Rocky, Gray, Stevenson, Daz, Boyler and Flo. Everyone of them would get a start for me before the players today, possibly with the exception of Rocky as Maxwell had two good penalty stops to secure us an extra point. However I will start by saying we were fucking garbage and were lucky to come away with the extra point. slow, lethargic, half hearted, pishy passy, lacking in dig, no natural goalscorer up front and worryingly one substitution when we are playing poorly.

The line up was as expected a mix of experience, newbies and youngsters, BUT Hecky promised we would play to win. We didnt and he didnt change it. Maxwell in goal would have pissed Rocky off, Whitts came in at right back and was a diamond in a massive, steaming, smelly toly of a team, Jackson switched to right sided centre back, Hanlon was poor at left sided centre back, James at left back. Mallan and Campbell sitting as deep as Milligan or Barts most of the game, Newell out wide offering nothing, not even effort or endeavour, Horgan trying but fizzling out after 60 minutes down the right, Scotty sitting in as a false number nine when not asked to move around to accomodate the useless Newell and Christian Doidge working really really hard but ploughing a lonely big field up front on his own. Only Fraser Murray came on for Newell. I could have came on for Newell and done more than this duffer. The only other change I saw was asking Scotty to go wide left to bring Newell into the middle, how very dare you Hecky. Scott and Stevie Mallan were so far apart they could not influence the game much of the time and when we did make the switch we put Fraser on the left where he ended up letting James get down the wing, waste of Fraser’s ability, given Daryll was burst after an hour. None of the play showed any desire, no-one really lead the team, the gap between the back six (4 + 2) and front four was the size of the grand canyon. My eyes were bleeding, Shrink pished his seat.

Who done their job, well Whitts, Jackson, Josh Campbell and Christian Doidge can go home feeling like the gave it a go, the rest should be in at training at 8 tomorrow morning. I also know Whitts, Jackson, Josh Campbell and Christian Doidge would turn up fot training if asked, its called application and too many DID NOT apply themselves.

Where was Flo by the way, it was suggested he was at TRANSMIT in the weege by his agent? WTF?

Before I go into the team and individual performances, I think it is worthwhile pointing out two things, the long grass, well done Stirling Albion, any advantage take it. The other is the fantastic Hibernian support today. Stirling Albion suggested 2100 fans at the game, I hope the Inland Revenue had a rep there? Two ends full, and a third end half full of Stirling fans and an overspill of 20-30 or so Hibs fans? In a 3808 capacity stadium where in Sauzee’s name were 1700 fans going to sit/ stand. Well done those that came along, they dinnae deserve us. Stirling Albion, you deserve more fans though, well done. Well done on the cash gates Binos! 


OK, the team

Maxwell, no chance at the Stirling goal and two very good penalty saves.

Whitts had a good game and done little wrong and a whole lot right. I have more faith in him covering for Sir David than others, he played well.

Jackson is a big no nosense centre half than can play left or right. He is not quiet Tommy McIntyre, he is not Daz but he is a bit better than Shaun Dennis, that give you an idea of what we have signed?

Paul Hanlon was poor, sorry, I hate to ever, ever write that but he was.

James played left back after starting right back previous games, he did fine, but he disnae have a cross in him, little attacking instinct but did hit a fine shot last minute. Cannae wait for Lewis to be fit again.

Mallan had to play so deep he was ineffective. I heard today Hecky in one of his burgeoning soundbites said Hibs don’t have defensive midfielders we only have midfielders. Your right Hecks, we don’t, but we are fucking well missing one. To sacrifice Mallan and Campbell to cover for the fact we have lost Barts and Millie is shameful and weakened us greatly. Worse against a wee part time team.

Josh Campbell, like Stephen Whittaker, at opposite ends of their careers, was a workhorse, a player in a field of dross. Great laddie who I already love watching.

Scott Allan scored a penalty, missed another and we saw snippets of your genius. I was fair pissed off when you were pushed out left to accomdate a switch for the duffer from Rotherham, bet you were too! Hair was a bit buoffant today, bit mair wax/ gel needed son.

Newell is rotten, think Paul Holsgrove, Brian Hamilton, Jarkko Wiss and Alan O’Brien, then think what could be worse. Then think of Brandon Barker and Kevin McAllister and what we thought we had signed.

Horgan gave us snippets of his ability but is back to flagging after 60 minutes, yet he played 90. I blame the management team for that. If we had no one to replace him, we picked the wrong subs as Daryll always flags last quarter of any game.

Christian Doidge is a player. Sadly he is nae single striker. He will score goals, but could set up more if he had a partner with a nose for goals. Wins the ball well, can win a header, likes a knock on. Nae #$%^@!#$%^@!#$%^@!#$%^@! near him though. Imagine Flo , Sparky 1 or Sparky 2 beside him. We will have too imagine it though as Flo wisnae in the squad, Sparky 1 plays for Thellick and Sparky 2 is doing his gairden.

Sub, fucking SUB!! One sub!

Yes, sub, we were gash yet only one change. Fraser Murray, who has looked decent in the ahem real friendlies, came on but in replacing Newell ended up as a left winger, for fuck sake. Clueless by the management team.

The Management team

Do not think the Hibs fans are mugs, be warned. The pish about trying things out, well its pish. The pish about playing to win, well what the fuck was that today. The physical, pressing game, try fucking DE=pressing game. The pish about you signings, well excluding the blessed Scotty who signed before you arrived, the signings are all squad players, not one stands out, not one. I know you all live in your wee bubble of fitba, with fitba 24/7, good wages, press attention, but remember WE are Hibernian FC, not you, you come and go, we are here for life, we have to watch that shite, we pay to do so. Get your act together, sign a defensive midfielder, sort out a striker to compliment the reasonable Doidge if Flo is not the one in your mind, get Omeonga back or Mulumbu in. There is a lot of good will from the fans, we want to give you a chance but there is no sign of progress, we have gone backwards, the signings are average, and whilst we are turning up in numbers, people will quickly drift off if you expect us to watch a Hibernian team play like the fucking Gunts. Sort it out and do not treat us like dafties.


The Ref was poor but that was not the reason for us scraping a win on penalties.

Stirling Albion, well I felt sorry for them today, they did not deserve to get beat. OK they had a twelfth man in the long grass, but we should accept that, thats fitba. I felt they played to our weaknesses and had we lost we could not of complained. Well done and I wish you all the best this season, another proper Scottish Local Club who deserve better, I hope the ehh, ahem, 2100 crowd’s income is spent wisely!

Man of the Match was Steven Whittaker, only Josh Campbell comes anywhere close.

In summary, imagine winning a game on penalties against a team three leagues below who had bettered us during the game. Fucking hopeless and I feel more like a Leeds fan than a Barnsley fan tonight.

Next up is Alloa back at Easter Road but only viewed from your own seat if you are willing to pay a premium. I hope we will be fielding some further new signings, as that was rotten today.

Hibernian Forever

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